“Dick pics get a bad rap because, well, some guys are dicks. So let’s get this straight – I don’t actually hate dick pics. I just dislike the unsolicited ones, because that’s just rude. I barely know you, what makes you think I want to see your peen? To be clear, I don’t go around soliciting dick pics, but when you’ve been dating someone for a while or are in a relationship, it’s not uncommon to sext.
So now we’ve established that dick pics are only OK if they’re not unsolicited, let’s move on to the actual picture itself. Just ask a random sample of girls and you’d be surprised at the amount of effort that goes into sending nudes. A Google search will also throw up dozens of articles for women on how to take amazing nudes. But most of the time, you just don’t see the same amount of effort from guys. Is it really that hard (hehe) to art-direct it a little first? It’s pretty obvious when a guy just whips it out without much thought and snaps it as it is, which can look a little sad. It’s like what Thad Castle said on Blue Mountain State when giving a lesson on dick pics: “The key is effort, gentlemen.”
And the best dick pic I’ve received thus far? It was from someone who let me know he was going to send me one, used soft lighting, knew what his most flattering angle was and did a little bit of grooming. It has been close to a year since we last saw each other, but it still stuck with me, so he clearly did something right.” – Sophie, senior features writer
More from CLEO:
“Unless it’s clear that the girl he’s texting wants them, I don’t get why some guys send unsolicited dick pics. Sure, if he’s well-endowed, that might be impressive. But the sheer audacity of sending one and thinking he’d get a positive response is a turn off. So while I’m able to admire a handsome stallion, I’ll still keep a distance from one that’s unsafe for riding.
Unsolicited dick pics pretty much say that the guy has no personality whatsoever, and so resorts to getting naked to try and impress. Thankfully, it’s the age of the Internet, so I think women have become unfazed by unsolicited dick pics. In fact, I’m more disappointed than anything when I receive one because that’s one less guy to talk to. No one wants to go further with a creep.
Anyhow, here’s a fun way to shut down someone who sends you an unsolicted dick pick: send him back a picture of a better-looking peen and say ‘this is how a dick with a future looks like’. Then apply cold water to burnt area.
As for dick pics in general, even if it’s from a lover, I can’t say I get very thrilled. I much rather he employ a sense of humour to get me excited. And when I’m excited, his dick will end up in places – not just in a picture.” – Adora, writer
Illustrations: Darren Ezekiel
Additional text: Adora Wong