Leanne*, 32, and Sabrina*, 33, were good friends who had a lot in common – including a man they dated and slept with. Here, Leanne shares how she found out that her guy was seeing her friend behind her back.
“Sabrina and I met about 10 years ago. We’d both recently finished university and begun work in the same insurance firm, and we bonded straight away – we both enjoyed water-sports and yoga, and we even dressed similarly and styled our hair the same way. Our colleagues told us that we could be twins, even though Sabrina was a year older than me.
“Almost every weekend, we would hang out at our favourite nightspots or check out the latest bars. We were both single and one of our favourite things to do was go out and meet new guys. Once in a while we’d get involved with these men, but none of these relationships ever worked out for us.”
Looking for love online
“A couple of years ago, I joined a dating app. During the first couple of months I met – and went out with – many guys. Unfortunately, none of these dates turned into anything serious. More often than not, the guys just wanted to have sex; otherwise, I found them to be rude, boring or strange.
“A few months after I joined the dating app, I was matched with a good-looking lawyer called Derrick. When we finally met in person, sparks flew; we enjoyed great conversation and plenty of laughs. Derrick asked to see me again, and of course I said yes. It didn’t take me long to fall in love with this man – he was everything I wished for even though he seemed too good to be true.”
In love with the same guy
“A couple of months into my relationship, Sabrina confided that she had started seeing a new guy and that he had fallen in love with him. She told me that his name was Derrick, but she refused to tell me anything else because she believed that it was bad luck to discuss a new relationship. Of course, Derrick is not an unusual name so I didn’t even entertain the possibility that she could be talking about my Derrick.
“At the same time, I started to see less of Derrick because, according to him, he was experiencing a busy period at work and had to travel overseas to meet clients. I didn’t suspect anything unusual. After all, he was a lawyer and I know how busy working at a law firm can get.
“One evening, I decided to try a new restaurant with my sister. As we walked to our table, I saw Sabrina at one end of the restaurant. She saw me too and waved. As I walked over to her, I noticed that she was with a guy but his back was towards me so I couldn’t see his face. When I got closer, it became clear to me that the guy was Derrick. I couldn’t believe it!
As Sabrina stood up to introduce him to me, Derrick and I came face to face. He was equally shocked to see me but he also looked scared. ‘I don’t understand…’ I said. Then it dawned on me – Sabrina and I were seeing the same Derrick! Shocked, horrified and upset, I ran out of the restaurant, my cheeks hot and red and my eyes brimming with tears.”
Two friends taken for a ride
“On the way home, I texted Sabrina to tell her that I had been dating Derrick too, and was, in fact, deeply in love with him. She told me that she had no idea he was two-timing us and apologised. But then she admitted that she was in love with him too.
Much later, she called me to say that she dumped Derrick after learning the truth from him. Apparently, he told her that he liked us both but couldn’t decide which girl he wanted. Sabrina told him that she’d make the decision for him and broke up with him on the spot. When Derrick called me trying to make amends, I told him to get lost and expressed my disgust with him.
“Sabrina and I cried to each other over the phone that night. We’d both lost the guy whom we thought was the love of our lives, but worse, we felt horrible about having been duped.
Worse of all, we found out that Derrick had used the same lines on us and promised us the same things. It was also hurtful to know that we’d both had sex with Derrick. It made Sabrina and I feel used and abused, especially since we had genuinely loved him.
“Sabrina and I never heard from Derrick again. Even though we had both only known him a few months, the experience shook us to our core and made us fearful about using dating apps. Thankfully, my friendship with Sabrina was not affected by what happened. We could’ve easily fought over Derrick but we knew better than to abandon years of sisterhood and closeness for a cheating jerk. After that experience, Sabrina and I promised to tell each other about the guys we met and dated. There’s no way we could endure heartache like that!”
*Names have been changed.
Text: Melissa Wong / Her World / May 2017
For similar stories, visit herworld.com.
For more dating stories, read CLEO Asks: What Do Guys Find Most Attractive About A Girl? and 10 Signs You’re Dating A Player.