Heard of tantric sex but not quite sure what it is? Or maybe you know what it is, but find it all rather intimidating? Either way, it’s probably safe to say that it’s the type of sex you never knew you needed.
First things first: tantric sex is essentially a slow form of sex. It’s an ancient Hindu practice that involves the expansion of sexual energy, and contrary to popular belief, is easy to get into.
“Because you’re unsure what tantra is, you may expect some sort of framework around it. But anybody can practise tantra. A lot of it involves common sense,” says Dr Martha Tara Lee, a clinical sexologist at Eros Coaching. Dr Lee has undergone tantric training and currently teaches tantric practices.
And anybody can do it because it requires little more than mindfulness. You know how, when spending quality time with your partner, you actively choose to focus on them? You pretty much do the same during tantric sex.
“The first thing to do is block out your time—because you won’t want to be interrupted—and find a space you feel comfortable in. Then, connect with your body. This might mean taking a deep breath, making a sound, shaking your body, or stretching yourself,” says Dr Lee.
“Once you warm your body up, listen to what else it feels like doing. This might mean connecting with your partner by eye gazing, hand holding, and caressing each other. When you achieve that connection, you can ‘expand’ your energy with each other.”
But just why’d you want to do all that? Apparently, there are plenty of benefits to tantric sex. Dr Lee says that you’ll not only be able to develop a deeper connection with yourself and your partner, but also cultivate patience (by giving yourself the time to feel what needs to be felt), creativity (by letting your inner child come out to play) and selflessness (by giving and receiving when you’re at peace).
She adds that this very sensual practice also promotes empowerment.
“It helps you take back ownership of your body and sense of self,” she points out.
Want to learn how to “expand” your sexual energy better so you can enjoy tantric sex and experience deeper pleasure in bed? Dr Lee has five tips. Scroll the gallery to check them out.